Makes me cry.....

Why god why? These were the first words out of my mouth when I heard that the piece of s**t governor from Illinois, Rod Blagojevich has a book coming out called The Governor. Why go why? Who gives a s**t about what sorry a** excuses this guy has for being a piece and being "wrongfully ousted from his office."

ANyone who buys this book should be tagged by the government and secretly kidnapped and beaten in the middle of the night. They are useless to society.

What could this book possible have in it? Sorry, you're a piece of s**t that got caught, now just quietly ride off into the sunset. I am sure there are politicians who have done far worse, but you were caught. Now take it like a man, don't try to get rich off of it by writing a book. The publishing company that makes this book should be taken over by the government and shut down.

I would be even more embarrassed to be from Illinois lately. You've had the Cubs for the past 100 years, now you have that guy who threw a beer at Shane Victorino, and now you have this.

Makes me smile

This story here about the choas and fighting within the Viking locker room makes me smile. Not because I have anything against Favre, it's just funny to see yet another horrific thing happen to the state of Minnesota.

I actually couldn't care less about Favre coming back. I appreciate everything he did for Green Bay sports. Keep in mind that if he was never on the Packers, the Packers would still be a joke of a franchise and would not be able to get any free agents, think 1980s and early 1990s. So we can not judge him now. He is too sad to just retire and go into the booth as John Madden's replacement (it will happen) and someday be an assistant coach, or even head coach. Let him play and prove to himself that he is done.

I just find it funny that Minnesota thought they were the clear favorites to win the division and even the Super Bowl. The quarterback was not holding them back last year. You could find any 90 year old grandmother to hand off to Adrian Peterson 50 times a game. I just want to know who in that locker room pointed them out as Sage Rosenfels fans. That's embarrasing.

Earlier this week I blogged about that incredible story about a "reality show star" who killed his stripper wife, and I commented that the story could not get any more incredible. I was wrong.

Long time listener, first time caller...........

It seems that all along I have had 5 readers, not the 4 I thought I had. It also seems that my 5th reader took my jokes a bit too far this past week. You may have heard of this story of some dude on a couple of VH1 "reality" shows that killed his stripper wife and cut her up and put her in a suitcase and is now on the run in Canada.

This story seems unbelievable on some many levels.

• Somehow a guy with some serious offenses in the past was accepted onto a tv show. He was also on a show in which some hooker picked out of a group of millionaires. (She really just banged them all and one guy banged her the most and "won.") However, this guy is obviosuly far from being a millionaire.
• This guy cut her up and she was identified by her breast implants.
• This guy was on two different shows on VH1. He is on "Megan Wants a Millionaire," which was half way through their season. (The chick from Megan Wants a Millionaire was on 3 or 4 shows. Is it that hard to find idiots willing to embarrass their families on VH1?) He was already eliminated, but VH1 has pulled all episodes of the show off, and removed it from their website, it is almost as if it never existed. Now there is a rumor that he was on "I Love Money 3" that has not aired at all yet. There is a rumor that he even won the $250000 grand prize. VH1 will not air that at all, but he may have already received the cash prize and is in Canada with it.

Don't get me wrong, it's horrible that this woman was killed, but this whole thing seems out of a shitty novel or some terrible movie.

Since a certain rival political blogger never posted this video, I will post the video of the best response from a politician to a stupid question. It is probably political suicide, but it is funny:

This seems familiar

Last week I blogged about how similar the movie Gamer is to The Running Man from 20 years ago. Well it seems like Hollywood is at it again.

Here is a trailer for a new movie (yes it looks horrible, but that is not my point)



Hmmmm, seems familiar. Maybe because it is this same movie:


Wow! Let's look at the similarities:

• A group of kids think they accidentally kill someone (while drinking), then when trying to hide the body, they really kill them.
• They dump the body in water (or in a well)
• They agree to keep this secret the rest of their lives.
• They begin to start to be terrorized and killed one by one.
• The killer is some large man in a rain jacket with his face covered (literally looks the same in both movies).
• The killer uses some kind of hook to do the killing

Sad Hollywood this is the same movie with an updated cast of horrible actors. Fail


Editors note: I am choosing not to blog about this at this time.

OMG, WTF, LMAO

I know some of my loyal readers refuse to ever sign up for facebook,
but I am on it and I believe it serves some point. I don't go on there
and mak any moves, upload pictures, comment on other peoples' pages,
or constantly update my status. I use it to send messages to a few
people on there and to stalk my ex-wife. Now with facebook
applications, it is incredibly easy to do stuff. I have now noticed a
few coworkers on there, and they update their status every hour and
leave hundreds of comments on everyone else's pages. Do these people
feel so invisible and need attention that much? They've left comments
like "I hate Mondays." "sitting outside, glass of wine, life is
great." "can you believe this episode of True Blood. OMG." There is
even this one horrible teacher who is teaching summer school and
updates her status during class. WTF. This is just stupid. First off,
do your job. Secondly, if anyone important saw this, you could get
into serious trouble. Grow up, do your job, and realiE that no one
gives a s**t about you.

Faith Restored

I was watching the G4 network today, a show about various summer
movies, and they had a ticker on the bottom of the screen with live
comments on their website from viewers. On TV they had two
professional critics debating GI Joe. One guy said it was horrible
(the smart one) and one guy said he enjoyed it and was exactly what he
wanted and would see it again (the dumb and possible retarded one).

The funny part was the comments on the bottom.
"the movie stars Marlon Wayans, so no it is not good."
"this movie gave my childhood the middle finger, sorry 5 year old
Timmy."
"that guy who likes his movie obviously had a mother who drank while
pregnant, hopefully she is still drinking so she doesn't notice her
son is a failure."

Awesome stuff. I know have faith in people who have no job and sit at
home making comments about a tv program online.

Let's play a game

Let's play again here, see if you can spot the differences in the movies from the two trailers below. These movies were made 20 years apart but are basically the same thing.





Here is a synopsis of Gamer and a synopsis of The Running Man.

• Both movies are about convicted fellons fighting each other for their freedom, in theory.
• Both take place in the near future when the world has changed, the economy has collapsed, and violence and chaos reign.
• Both "games" are run by a ruler like man, Richard Dawson in Running Man and Michael C. Hall in Gamer.
• I am guaranteeing you that in Gamer it will turn out that Gerard Butler is innocent of his crime, just like in Running Man.
• Just like in Running Man, the ruler like man will do whatever it takes to make sure no one ever "wins" and gets out, even if he has to cheat.
• Gerard Butler is quickly turning into the next Schwarzenegger. (Future Governor??) He is known for making these ridiculous action movies that take no acting skills and even have very few lines (300??) and then gets praised as this great actor. He then tries his hand at a comedy (The Ugly Truth) and fails miserably. Both are from a foreign country (Butler is from Scotland)
• I am really having a hard time finding differences in these movies except one is a tv show and the other is a video game.

I know hollywood has run out of ideas, but come on.

Darwin was wrong

So, I was out driving around yesterday and drove past a theater right when the movie was getting out. This theater only has one screen and was playing G.I.Joe, so I know everyone there was seeing that movie. It was sad to see that a theater picked that as the one movie they are playing, and it was sad to see so many choosing to see that movie. I'll give you one guess on the type of people that where walking out of the theater. A hint is that the first word is white and the second word rhymed with with flash.

The real kicker was that I saw these two douche bags walk out and then high five each other. WTF? Who does that to begin with, let alone after that movie? Sad. I would rather be punched in the face for 90 minutes than see that "movie." I think if I were trapped and tied to my seat while that was playing my eyes would take one for the team and fall out of my head. Wow, they really high-fived each other coming out of the theater.

4

Money Wasted

SO today, Eli Manning signed a 6 year $97 million contract. This makes him the highest paid player in NFL history. He is not even the best player at his position. This must be some kind of joke. I mean look at his career stats. He has a 6 year career, with an average QB rating of only 76.1. He has 98 career TD passes and 74 interception. The only reason any one pays any attention to him is because of his last night and some how they squeeked a Super Bowl victory past the Patriots 2 years ago.

Let's just compare him to some other QBs:

• Tom Brady career 92.9 rating, 197 TDs, 86 interceptions (3 Super Bowls)
  
• Tony Romo career 94.7 rating, 81 Tds, 46 interceptions
• Peyton Manning career 94.8 rating, 333 TDs, 165 ints (1 Super Bowl)
  
• Drew Brees career 89.4 rating, 168 TDs, 99 ints
• Jake Delhomme career 85.1 rating, 115 TDs, 76 ints
• Phillip Rivers career 92.9 rating, 78 TDs, 36 ints
• Ben Roethlisberger 89.4 rating, 101 TDs, 69 ints (2 Super Bowls)

Anyone of these players are worth twice what The Giants are paying Eli. I can't wait to see him fall on his a**, especially now since they don't have Plexico for him to just throw the ball in the air for.

Video Time

I blogged in the past about the potential of a new Comedy Central show, Michael & Michael Have Issues. Now it has aired 3 episodes, and they had this clip that is hilarious, although it does hit a little close to home for me.

Michael & Michael Have Issues	Wed 10:30pm / 9:30c
Break-Up Sweatpants
www.comedycentral.com
Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

If you've lost all faith in humanity, especially in the future generations (I know I have), watch this video that was on ESPN over the weekend. I can't embed it, so you have to go over to ESPN to watch it, but it is worth it.

Also, I am a little happier today, and have a little more faith in humanity, after reading this story about how poorly T.O.'s "reality show" is doing. It tied with a 2 am episode of Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Awesome.