Tuesday, March 31, 2009

On Notice

I haven't updated my Dead to Me and On Notice list in a while so here we go (there will be more at weeks end)

The Screen Actor's Guild strike has made its way off the On Notice list since it has been over a year since it ended. To replace that I have nominated Hollywood Movie Ideas.

I was trying to numb my senses again tonight by turning on the television and had to sit through this extended preview for a new movie, called "Fighting." Not only is it a terrible movie, they spent about 15 seconds thinking of a title. (he let's call Shawshank Redemption "prison" Saving Private Ryan "war" and Pulp Fiction "drugs and violence.") Check it out:



Wow, that movie is basically a mix of Fight Club, Fast and the Furious, one of those shitty dancing movies, and a hip hop video. Why is Academy Award-nominee Terrence Howard in that? I love the message; if you are struggling to get by and can't find your place in this world, beat the shit out of each other in an underground fighting competition. I hope all the kids out there see this and learn this valuable lesson.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Haven't I been here before?

On Sunday I went to Madison with by birth father (details aren't necessary for this post, at least until the court case clears up). On the way out of town we decided to grab a bite to eat. He said he had heard of a Mexican restaurant called Panchero's. We had no idea what it was. When we drove by and parked my dad made the comment, looks like it might be a little like Qdoba or Chipotle. Upon getting in we noticed it was EXACTLY like those two restaurants. How many times can you copy the same business plan? (Plus it's not the best business plan in the first place).

Let's see here:
  • All three have high ceiling, metal chairs, pipes hanging, and a "warehouse" feel.
  • All three serve the same food; burritos, tacos, salads, quesidallas, and chips and salsa.
  • Here is the menu of Panchero's, here is Qdoba, and here is Chipotle. I dare you to find a difference.
  • In fact Panchero's had fewer meat selections, and fewer salsa's. So they actually have a worse business plan.
  • Oh wait, one thing they did do differently was after they put all your ingredients on the shell, before they wrapped it up, they took this and mixed up all your ingredients. Brilliant.
I have no idea how this is a successful business with multiple stores in Wisconsin alone, when there are already 2 restaurants that do the exact same thing.

Oh wait, I forget the original reason I was angry when I walked in, which made me almost walk out. Look here.

What in god's name could a restaurant be twittering about? "customer just came in better stop spitting in the guacamole and serve this idiot" "just finished new batch of crystal meth now waiting for high school kids to come in and buy it."

Just in case you were curious, here is their twitter. If you are curious, kill yourself.

Good Television for a change

If any of you missed tonight's House because you were watching Dancing with the Stars, you missed great television. House has been building the past few episodes back into it's once great self. Tonight's episode featured a guy (played by Mos Def) who had locked in syndrome. Basically he was paralyzed and brain dead from the outside, but inside he was totally alive. He could feel pain and see everything around him, he just couldn't interact with it. Here is a preview:



Over 40 minutes of the episode was directly from Mos Def's point of view lying in the bed, unable to move or interact. It was pretty cool. There were also a few dream sequences of him interacting with House that were also cool. Definitely should check it out.

It also got me to think about Mos Def. He is one of probably 2 rappers that I can take seriously enough as an actor (Will Smith is the other, and you could argue he was never a rapper). LL Cool J and Ice Cube and Ice T are all jokes. Mos Def is cool because he actually carries his own wait in movies and TV along side very powerful actors.
  • Be Kind Rewind (not a very good movie, but he holds his comedic own against Jack Black
  • Chappelle Show- was on 6 episodes and was hilarious in all 6
  • 16 Blocks- again not a very good movie, but more than holds his own against Bruce Willis
  • The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - never saw it, but he is pretty much the lead role
  • He stays with his name Mos Def when acting, which is cool
  • He has stayed true to his rap roots, still laying down the same type of rap songs, never once selling out and making more "radio friendly" rap music. Now, if white people start liking his rap music, we might have a problem


Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Emo Sells

I've come to the conclusion that every trailer for a new movie should contain a song from The Arcade Fire.

Here is a brand new trailer for Where the Wild Things Are.



I am actually excited about this movie. I do remember the book when growing up, it did have pictures. I think it is cool that they are taking a classic kids' movie and letting Spike Jonze get his crazy hands on it (see Adaptation or Being John Malkovich). I also think it is cool that hipster-writer Dave Eggers wrote the screenplay. What a great idea to take a 48 page children's book and let a hipster dude who wrote a 560 page book about an African refugee running for his life based on a true story.

I also thought that this trailer for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button was bad-a@@, especially with the eerie Arcade Fire music.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

The Village Bicycle.......



It's a sad day here in the Chopper household. My car hit the 100,000 mile mark this afternoon. As promised, the second it 100,000 miles I just pulled over, got out, lit the car on fire, and walked away. You'll be missed, we made many late night runs to "take care of business." I was raised that once anything has served it's purpose, just light it on fire and leave by the side of the road.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

New Game


On my drive home tonight I invented a new game, guess who's on their cell phone. You can tell just by how someone is driving if they are talking on their phone. So during my whole drive home tonight I tried guessing who was on their phone and then caught up with them and found out if they were.

Just some of the things I saw:
  • Someone driving 45 in the fast lane on the freeway
  • Someone slowed down to 25 becuase they were in the left-hand lane and they needed to exit -woops)
  • Someone who left their blinker on for 5 blocks after turning
  • Someone who sat at an intersection throughout the enitrre 15 second turn arrow.
  • Someone who went straight through a red light because the turn arrow turned green
  • Someone came within 6 inches of running over a family of ducks crossing the parkway, this despite two cars in front of them had actually already stopped. (This person went around them, thinking they had stopped for no reason).
Guess what, they were all on their phones.

St. Patrick's Day additions

I would have added this clip to my post yesterday about St. Patrick's day, but I had not seen it yet. This is a pretty funny clip about how angry Irish people are about the AIG bailout.


The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c
Rage in the Streets
comedycentral.com
Daily Show Full EpisodesImportant Things w/ Demetri MartinPolitical Humor

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Learn how to act

Yesterday at the last minute I was called in to celebrity bartend at my not so local tavern for St. Patrick's Day. I only worked the short shift from 5-10, but I got a good jist of little people know about going out in public.
  • Do not call it "St. Pat's Day," it is St. Patrick's Day a-hole.
  • If you go to an Irish bar on St. Patrick's Day, it will be busy. You don't have to keep saying, "man, it is busy here. I didn't think you guys would be busy."
  • Don't just order "a green beer" for the sake of ordering a green beer. Order what beer you would normally drink. I lost count of the number of people who just ordered "a green beer" and didn't care what it was. I think as a joke you should order a keg of O'DOuls or another N/A beer and dye it green.
  • Someone actually tried to order Bushmill's, I just walked away.
  • There are correct and polite ways to order a drink, the bartender is not missing you on purpose. Do not waive money at them. The bartender isn't skipping you because he doesn't know if you have money, and then oh wait, now he sees the money, so now he will help you.
  • Know one else cares how drunk you are: you should come in, drink and drink, and once you are drunk get up and leave. There were so many people (some already at 5 p.m.) who were screaming "I'm drunk!" - I don't care. There were people knocking over glasses and spilling, without a care of who would be cleaning it. There were drunks who thought because they were drunk, that they deserved to get served drinks before people less drunk.
  • I made the comment to another bartender there, "Doesn't anyone just sit in their basement alone and drink anymore?"
  • All in all, a good time. You can tell who has done this before and is a professional, and who is a first-timer.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

I guess they are good for something

I tell you what, the Irish don't do much right (trust me I know a bunch of them) but they do make a hell of a shake.



I never go to McDonald's, but today I went and got a Shamrock shake, damn that is good. I think I will go get one more this week, and wait 52 weeks again until I go to a McDonald's.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

A break from reading

I know that that post was long and had a lot of reading, in return here is a video that is pretty funny:

Good Night Sweet Prince

I have written in the past about how many TV shows just kill off characters when they cannot think of anything better to do. Two shows I have ranted about in the past (Lost and 24) have been doing much better. Neither ahs really killed off any main characters this season, until Monday night.

24 killed off one of their top 3 main characters, Bill Buchanan, but they did it right. He had been with the show for 4 seasons and was a great character that really moved along the plot and made it possible for Jack Bauer to do a lot of the things he wanted to do. On last night's episode he gave up his life so the current terrorist situation with the President and the White House experiencing a hostage situation. When he died, they played violin music for the first time, and the show usually goes to commercial with a loud ticking clock, but this time it went to commercial in total silence. I will miss his character, but it made me think about the top "2nd-tier stars" on television. Not the main characters of a show, but characters that make everything else on the show happen. Here is the list I thought of while driving home from work:
  • Bill Buchanan 24- (made it possible for Jack Bauer to do everything, risked his life and his job many times for the protection of his country)
  • Wilson- House (with having House's best friend on the show, everyone would just see that House is an emotionally-dead jerk. He is an emotionally-dead jerk, but with his interactions with his friend WIlson, we see there is something more there below the surface.
  • The Janitor- Scrubs (he is always good for a lagh. Even when the show gets too serious, he will have a scene where he terrorizes JD and you are reminded that this is just a comedy).
  • Kramer- Seinfeld (almost too obvious to mention)
  • Lester Freamon- The Wire (he doesn't get all that many scenes, but in every season, the only reason that the Police wire tap works is because of his knowledge and due-dilligence towards the case. I think literally none of the cases they worked on would have ever worked without him.)
  • Jim - The Office (he is probably the funniest character opn the show, his battles with Dwight are priceless, plus he is probably the best salesman there, and he is a nice guy that moves along many of the storylines- when Dwight breaks up with Angela, he is there; when Michael feels left out that no one will sign chareokee with him, JIm sings; and when Andy gets dumped by his high school girlfriend, Jim is there.
  • Nick Stokes- CSI (He is not the main character, but recently many characters have left but he has stayed. This week is episode #200. He is the only character that has broken down and cried over a case and seems to take a personal interest in the cases, plus once he was buried alive as a season-ending cliff hanger.
  • Sawyer- Lost (Here is a character that has really evolved like no other on a show ever. He has never been the main character, but we have really seen some evolution. He started off a jack-a** that we are not suppossed to like, then we see stuff from his past so we learn why he is like that, then we see that he is a bigger jerk than he should be, and then last year we see him as a hero who gives up everything to save his friends, and now this season we see him as the leader and willing to risk everything again.)

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Worth Reading

There are few blogs out there that I deem worthy of my time, but one such blog is Bill Simmons' Mailbag on Page 2 of ESPN.COM. He says he is a sports writer, but he answers questions in general about a wide variety of topics, and tend to make some of the same things in society that I do. (Dad, is that you?)

In his most recent Mailbag he hit upon two interesting subject:

First he defended Facebook, but said some of people's updates are stupid and worthless, but he did go on to rip Twitter a new a**hole. I agree that twitter is the end of intelligent thought and grammar in society. People right about whatever they want, whenever they want, from where ever they want. People (even Senators) use slang, numbers to stand for words, and no punctuation. Horrible.

The other funny topic was when he talked about Bromances, and listed his top Bromances of all time:
The original bromance was Lewis and Clark. I'd break down the others like this: Costanza and Seinfeld (funniest); Norm and Cliff (second funniest); Diggler and Rothchild (third funniest); Borat and Azamat (grossest); O.J. and A.C. (most controversial); the Rat Pack (most influential); Kimmel and Carolla (drunkest); Puffy and Biggie after Biggie died (most shameless); Flintstone and Rubble (best animated); Mike and the Mad Dog (most tragic); Kurt Warner and Jesus (most inspirational); Jules and Vincent Vega (most violently entertaining); McEnroe and Fleming (most one-sided); Kobe and Shaq (most destructive); Lincoln and Derickson (most suspicious); Damon and Affleck (wealthiest); Tom and Jerry (most psychotic); Cagney and Lacey (just kidding); Michael Jackson and Emmanuel Lewis (openly creepiest); Bob Crane and John Carpenter (secretly creepiest); Spade and Farley (best one-time chemistry that couldn't be recreated, even by them); King and Favre (most gushing); Lennon and McCartney (most successful); Parker and Stone (most creative); A-Rod and Jeter (most contrived); Clapton and Harrison (biggest backstab); Chuck D and Flava Flav (most unlikely); Siegfried and Roy (best romance bromance); McConaughey and Armstrong (most appearances without a shirt); Bauer and Almeida (most exciting); Wilbon and Kornheiser (most reliable); De Niro and Pesci (best mafia); Redford and Newman (coolest); Simon and Garfunkel, Malone and Stockton, Madden and Summerall (tie for "best fit"); Scottie and Michael (most titles); Hanks and Scolari (biggest disparity of talent); Rocky and Apollo, Daniel-San and Miyagi, Buck and Aikman (tie for "most uncomfortable"); Clooney and Pitt (most overrated); Kirk and Spock, Tango and Cash (tie for "most unintentional comedy"); McNulty and Bunk, Big Papi and Manny (tie for "most underrated"); T-Mac and Vince (least likable); Felix and Oscar (best contrast); and Red and Andy (the greatest bromance ever), with Red and Andy's beach hug in Mexico doubling as the single greatest bromance moment.

If you know who half those people are, you are a pop-culture god. (Sadly, I knew over half).

Well, I'm off to Chicago for 24 hours (don't ask), so I will go "radio-silent" until then.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Lake Effect

I thought this guy (since it's in his name) was going to blog about this, but I guess he is getting his "Fun with the Internets" post ready for Sunday, so he doesn't have any more doubles this week. So I guess I will blog about the crazy weather that hit Milwaukee Monday morning and briefly during the day.

It basically depended on what part of the city you lived in, and you could have received anywhere from literally no snow, to up to 14 inches. Now, I have heard of some variance in weather across a city or geographic area, but that was a huge difference.

So here's where I live. I woke up to about 3 inches give or take (my whore of a wife probably woke up to about 8 inches)

Now, this is where my parents live. They woke up to 0 inches of snow, and got 0 throughout the day. (Note that this is about 8 miles west of my location.

Now here is where I work. This is about 4 miles south of my home and about 3 miles west. It was an interesting drive to school because as I drove south I noticed more and more snow had fallen over the night from where I live, and then while I drove west, there was less and less snow.

Now here is the airport location where they got about 8 over night and another 6-7 during the day.

The funny thing about all of this is that the official count is taken at the airport, so officially Milwaukee got 14 inches of snow for the day. In reality the east and the south were the only places where snow fell. The farther west and north that you went, the less snow that had fallen.

They b;lamed all this on lake effect, switching winds, yada yada yada. I don't believe in any of that wizardry. To me meteorology is a fake science. Whatever it was, I have never seen any weather like that before in my life.

On an unrelated note, who didn't see this coming. D'oh.