Ratings, ratings, ratings

So I've been watching a lot of The Wire lately, having recently purchased the entire series on DVD. It got me to thinking about how over the last 4-5 years, all good television is appearing on cable on channels like HBO, and network series are going down the hole. At first I thought it might have to do with the fact that HBO can show nudity and can swear, but it is much more than that. I think of Arrested Development and feel that it would still be on if it aired on basic cable or HBO. On the other side a show like Mad Men would have already been cancelled if it were on network television, even though it is the best drama on basic cable. The reason is obviously money, but more importantly is time.

Network tv relies on instant results with tv ratings, which directly relates to how much they can charge for commercials. If a show starts off the blocks slow, it is immedietely cancelled. I think of Arrested Development and to a lesser extent Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip (I watched) and Pushing Daisies (never watched). Both shows were critically acclaimed and had viewers who loved the show, however they didn't have many viewers. Due to the high cost of those shows with their large casts and elaborate storylines, they needed immediete results. More recently I look at Heroes. Heroes is NBC highest rated scripted program (sadly Biggest Loser is their highest rated show) but there is always a question of it will be renewed. They look critically at the viewership of EVERY episode (Pushing Daisies and Studio 60 were cancelled half way through the season when they still had filmed episodes that never aired). If a show has a 2-3 episode funct, they will be cancelled. So theses shows on network tv don't have the luxury of time to develop a sound stoyline and characters like they do on cable. They have to get right into the action and show results. Many people complained that Season 2 of Heroes (and Lost) were too "slow." Season 3 for both shows were then deemed "too fast." No time given to just develop into something.

Now on the other side we have HBO which gets its money just by people having the network and watching it. They don't care if you watch the network at 3 in the morning or in primetime at 7 at night. They can have "weaker" episodes of a show because you are still there watching something on the network. HBO can still take chances on shows no one else will and can keep shows on the air longer, because they still have people watching the network, and the money coming in.

The same is somewhat true for basic cable. They do rely on commercial revenue (which is based on viewers) but they also get a good hunk of their money from cable deals when cable providers like Time Warner Cable pay them to have their channels provided through them. So basic cable channels need money from commercials but can still take risks because they still have revenue coming in. Also, most basic cable channels are owned by a parent company which owns a bunch of cable channels. So, if one does poorly, the others can pick up the slack.

Now, heres to the solution to save network television TV series. network tv should sell commercial space as a whole, not for a specific show and time. A business (Budweiser for example) goes to NBC and buys 10 commercial spots for primetime Monday through Friday. These 10 spots will air randomly throughout the week, they cannot specifiy that they air during Biggest Loser or Law and Order. This way NBC just brings in money, and it doesn't matter which program has the highest ratings. As long as they provide overall quality programming, businesses will buy spots on their networks. Businesses will still buy ads, knowing that some will air during Crusoe (or whatever s**t they play) and some will air during Biggest Loser. Obla dee obla dah.

Random Rantings

A few things I have noticed in the last few days that made me angry (the last one is just bad-ass)

• I have ranted in the past about this switch to digital tv from analog tv. First off, it is not difficult. If you do not have cable or satellite service that you pay for, you need to get a converter; I have no idea why so many people are confused. Second, why doesn't the government just give away the converters because so many people are complaining that they cannot afford a $50 converter. Now the government has passed a bill that the switch will not take place until June. This is just getting sad. I think they should just scrap the whole thing at this point. The affect of the switch is very minimal (if any positive effects) but the money and time cost is way high. P.S. why is the government wasting time on passing a bill about this when we are fighting a war, the economy is in the s**t, we just switched presidents, etc?
• Somehow Paul Blart was the #1 movie in America. If you saw this movie, go kill yourself because clearly there is no way you could ever positively contribute to society. There are plenty of better movies out there now during "Award Season," or even better yet stay home and read a book or contribute to society.
• This story here is just bad ass. I once survived on whiskey for two days, but I wasn't really trapped under my sofa.

Digital Conversion PSA - watch more funny videos

Is this real?

I stumbled across this video today. I have no comment, just watch it for yourself.



I honestly cannot believe this is real.

However, I am interested in their Hall of Shame at Fox in New York, I have a few suggestions for them.

Two Quick Rants

I know this week is quickly turning into a week of updates on this blog but today I have two:

• Paul Blart Mall Fart was the #1 movie in America last weekend. WTF? So you mean to tell me that off all the people who went out to see a movie last weekend, the majority of them thought "Hey, why don't we go see that horrible movie about that fat stereo-typical American who has a s**tty job as a mall security guard, and some how he gets locked in with some people trying to rob the place after hours, and he saves the day without the cops help. Oh yeah, there are also two toilet seasons." WTF? Why not go see an actual good movie, seeing that this is the time of the year that all those award-winning movies are out.
• Last night I hid awayand watched the season premiere of Lost (good) but there were 6 commercials breaks in the first 60 minutes of the show. There was literally about 35-40 minutes of actual show to watch. I guess since the economy is doing horrible and companies are not willing to pay very much for an ad spot, the networks will just sell more commercial spots and have less show.

Some notes

The other day I had this commercial about something being released on January 19th. The commercial was vague and did not say anything, hence horrible marketing and a waste of money.

On January 19th they had this follow up commercial:


What? That commercial literally makes no sense. So LeBron James is going to play in the NFL (I know it is a joke) and this should be a reason that I should go buy insurance? What? I have seen this 5 times and it still makes no sense. This whole marketing campaign is a waste of money, and I am sure LeBron James is not cheap.

There were two "incidents" (here and here) this weekend at screenings of the Notorious B.I.G. movie. If you need more proof that Obama becoming President really changes nothing, see this. It is utterly sad that s**t like this still happens in a "civilized" country like America. I went a=and saw 3 different movies this weekend, and nothing stupid happened at them (except for the obvious "popcorn trick")

Finally here is a little video showing that Forrest Gump and Benjamin Button are the same movie. It's funny because they really are the same thing; in one the guy is mentally handicapped and in the other he is physically handicapped.

The Curious Case of Forrest Gump - watch more funny videos

Did the world just shake?

Since today is such a historical day with Barack Obama being sworn in as President, I thought I would have a few comments. This is not a political blog, it is a ranting blog, so my comments will fall in line with that.

• My dad took off today to watch coverage all day (psychopath), however he does have over 100 sick days accumulated and less than 5 years of work left, so he can do that I guess.
• I think this is a big day for what it stands for, the chance of better days for all. However, we need to understand that nothing will change if we do not get off our lazy a@@es and do something about it. Now that Obama is President, the economy isn't going to fix itself, everyone is not going to find a job around the corner, our enemies aren't going to stop hating us, global warming is not going to stop, and fossil fuels are going to turn unlimited. We still need to do stuff to make a difference. This is what I like about Obama, he realizes this and if every speech he gives he tells people this.
• Most people think it is all going to fix itself, seriously. I lost count of the number of people I have talked to in the last month who think everything is okay now, Obama is President. It doesn't change shit unless you want it to change something.
• I'm watching Headline News and they are having this correspendant answer phone calls and text messages about the important of today sent in by viewers. This guy should get an award for this. He is getting some absoltely asine comments, but he keeps responding: "Good point" "Yes, this is a great day." "I agree." He had a woman call in and say racism is behind us. Yes, she said that. Far from the truth. He also got a text message from a 13 year old that said although she is a Republican and didn't vote, she is behind Obama. I'm not even going to comment on that.
• This does not end racism. African American males still face 25% unemployment in this country (55% in Milwaukee), minorities are still 700% more likely to be born into poverty, their are still probably 75% of Americans who look down on minorities, and some unfortunetlely express their views in words and actions. One of the national news last night literally said, that "When Obama is sworn in, Martin Luther King's Dream will be fulfilled." Not even close. But I could go on this for pages.
• Many many callers on many news stations have been saying that now "we can put the last 8 years behind us." How, is Obama going to make a time machine. Thousands of people still died on Septemeber 11th, there are still thousands of troops in Iraq and Pakistan, over half the world still hates us, we still face 7% unemployment, we have still used tax dollars to bail out many industries, we are still running out of fossil fuels abroad, we have still fone great damage to the environment. Now, we cannot put the last 8 years behind us, they still happened.
  
• My final comment is that yes this is a great day. But, don't sit back and think that all will be saved now. We need to internalize what is happening and go out and be a soldier of change in our everyday lives.

This is a good speech:

What are you selling?

Do you all remember that old episode of The Simpsons from season 4 called "Krusty Gets Canceled." It is the one about a new rival show, Gabbo, starting. For weeks all everyone saw was this ad. Saying Gabbo was coming, and no one knew what it was. Was it some kind of product? Was it a restaurant? What? People start using the term "gabbo" in everyday language without even knowing what it was. Then it turns out it was a new show featuring a hand puppet.


Now we currently have two such commercials out there:

Who is that and what is he selling? This is America, I am sure you are selling something, tell me what it is. Today is 1.18.09 and I still have no idea what this is.


No really, what is G? I want to know. Apparently it is something about Gatorade, but how would one know by watching this commercial. Commercials are supposed to inform us about a product and convince you to buy something. If this commercial convinced me to buy something, I wouldn't know what to go out and buy. Stupid.

Award Season Continued

So apparently Larry the Cable Guy has some competition for the greatest actor of our generation. Larry the Cable Guy comes out with hit after hit. Yet today Kevin James came out with a beauty: Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Written, directed, produced, and starring Kevin James. You n=know it is a hit. Watch this trailer:



Wow, does that look like a P.O.S. Anyone who sees this should really consider doing society a favor and killing yourself. After seeing that, there is no way that you could positively contribute to society. I guarantee there is at least 1 toilet scene in there. Fat guy, trying to protect a mall all night, it has to lead up to a toilet scene.

The saddest thing about all this is that somehow the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel gave it 2 1/2 stars. WTF? Once again proofing why the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel is written by uneducated idiots.

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Due to the wrath of Mother Nature I did not have to work today. It is cold out, the TV is telling me that the temperature outside is -9 degrees and the windchill is -33 degrees. WTF? I didn't even know those types of temperatures existed below Canada. It also seems as if there is no end in sight. Over night temperatures are expected to reach -15 degrees with windchills below -40 degrees. Around tomorrow at noon, we are suppossed to snap out of it and reach 10 degrees and only -5 degree windchills.

Just as a side note with work being canceled today, we do have to make up the day at the end of the year in June, so I am not totally getting out of working.

Idiots? I think so.......

Sometimes you read stories about idiots, and then sometimes you read stories about complete idiots. Here is a story from Monday's Journal Sentinel (was also on Monday's news). Basically this group of young people went up to an old lady and tried to convince her that they new her and tried to relate to a problem the old lazy is having in her life. They just want her address so they can mail her some flowers for sympathy. As soon as the lady gives her the address, the young people plan on going to her house and robbing her, because they know she is not home. These young people probably do this to people all time but most people don't fall for it. This lady did. These young people probably thought they would get a little cash and some jewelry, this old lady had $100,000 lying around. For shame. My guess is that we are going to see many copy cat crimes like this in the near future.

Also, if you do not know about the digital switch that is occuring to TVs in 2 weeks, you are an idiot. It is on the bottom of the screen during every TV show, it has been in the paper, I heard it on the radio, I got something in the mail, etc. Sadly there are extreme idiots that still don't understand it. It is as simply as if you use an antenna, you need a converter box. Period. If you have cable or satellite, you are fine. Yet yesterday on the news there was a 15 minute piece about what to do and who needs a converter box or not. Couldn't they just say, "Look at your TV, if there are two metal sticks coming out of the top of it in a V shape, those are antennas, you need to buy a converter box." The news even went as far as having a little test at the end of the program. If you are safe you saw a "Passed the test" image, and if you are not safe, you saw static. They then came back and explained what to do if you saw static. They then went on to ask people are safe to ask their friends and family members if they need help understanding the digital switch, and then helping them. If any of my friends and family need help understanding this, or are not ready, I will take them out back and put them out of their misery.

At least it's something

So I know it happened a couple of days ago, but I was waiting for the dust to settle on the Brewers signing Trevor Hoffman. Overall I think it was a good move. He was signed for less than Gagne a year ago, he has been more consistent, and has never been mentioned in the same sentence as steroids. It also brought out the story that players actually like playing in Milwaukee, and they are respected as a great franchise and city. I actually think he will be fine to close games, but I worry that this only beginnings the work that needs to be done, instead of just stopping here. I think Villaneuva is the perfect set-up guy, but outside of him, there really isn't anyone else in the bullpen to put in.

One of those articles also hints at with the Hoffman signing, the Brewers' starting lineup is set. What? It is far from set. There lineup currently looks like Gallardo, Parra, Bush, Suppan, McClung. As I see it that is 2 #2 starters on any other team, and 3 #5 starters. Gallardo is about 2 years away from being a star and a #1 starter in this league. Parra will be a career #2 or #3, good not great. Bush and McClung are nice guy to finish a rotation in the #5 spot, and Suppan has no tight on a major league roster. The Brewers badly need another starter, or even bring back Sheets at a low risk and low money for a year or two, until Gallardo is ready to be your #1.

Theproblem is that there really is no one left, and those left was super star money, and sadly will get it somewhere. I hope the Brewers don't overpay a subpar pitcher, but at the same time, something needs to be done to fix their rotation, which might be the worst in the NL Central. (That Nick Swisher for Cameron trade seems interesting, and also opens us to the idea of moving Fielder next.)

Fantasy Draft

With this whole little dispute between Time Warner cable and Viacom finally settled, I thought it would be interesting to look at what channels one would choose to have. What better way to do this is in the form of another Fantasy Draft.

Fantasy Draft of TV channels (Premium Cable excluded). You can only watch the channels of those that you drafted, and you CANNOT watch the other shows on the Internet or with any other means.

1. Fox (it's got 24, House, reruns of Seinfeld,baseball games, and football games)
2. NBC (it's got Heroes, The Office, 30 Rock, and some football games)
3. ABC (it's got Lost, Scrubs)
4. FX Network (It's Always Sunny in Philedekphia, various movies)
5. Comedy Central (Daily Show, Colbert Report, various movies)
6. USA Network (various movies, Monk, reruns of House)
7. Discovery Channel (Cash Cab, Deadliest Catch, Myth Busters, various interesting shows)
8. G4 Network (reruns of Arrested Development, Lost, Heroes)
9. TBS (reruns of Office, Seinfeld, Family Guy, but also the home of Everyone Loves Ray)
10. ESPN (sports, but you can check scores in the paper)
11. CNN (news, but again you could always learn to read and read the paper)

Waiver wire picks:

• CBS (CSI, that's about it)
• TNT (various movies)
• Local Networks (reruns of Scrubs, Simpsons)
• The WB (Smallville)

I actually think it would be a cool way to run a cable provider is to give every subscriber a certain amount of points, and they can "buy" the channels they want. If they want to buy more channels, they pay a higher monthly fee. Each channel could be a different point value, depending on how popular it is. This way you would only get the channels you wanted

My ear's are bleeding...

So we all made it through another New Year. I guess that Y2K thing was just a scare, but what am I going to do with all these canned goods and a generator? OOh well

Here is my list of the best music of 2008. They are not ranked, just good music that came out this year: (I hate describing music, because everyone hears them differently, so I have thinks to their videos)

• Hold Steady- Stay Positive
• TV on the Radio- Dear, Science
• Bon Iva- For Emma, Forever Ago
  
• Vampire Weekend- Vampire Weekend
• Okkervil River- The Stand Ins
• Kanye West- 808's and Heartbreak
• Q-Tip- Renaissance
• Lil Wayne- Tha Carter III
• Silver Jews- Lookout Mountain, Lookout Sea
  
• Airborne Toxic Event- Airborne Toxic Event
  
• Ryan Adams & The Cardinals- Cardinology
• N.E.R.D.- Seeing Sounds
• Kings of Leon- Only By the Night

That's it. I'm sure I left some out, but screw it, it early and it's a New Year. 09!


I watched this last night, and they went to Dick Clark a couple of times. Man, is that guy in bad health. I know he had a stroke a year or two ago, but many he can barely move his mouth or talk. All that plastic surgery has caught up to him. It's too bad, he is a legend.