Football Rants

I'm not going to post about the Packers, except to say that their season is OVER, and they will be worse last year because of the moves Ted Thompson will make (trade Driver and Harris). That is all. (Also, Brian Gant who? Who needs him, Brandon Jackson looked even better today.)

I am now watching the Jets-Broncos game in the background while I sharpen my knifes, and there is a player on the Broncos with the first name Ebenezer. What? Why would you name your child that? Here is the wikipedia page about Ebenezer, and here is the first picture that comes up with a google search.

Are you packin?

I'm sure by now we have all heard about Plaxico Burress and him shooting himself in the leg after bringing a gun to the club. Well, now it is getting more complex. Apparently he didn't want to go to the hospital because they have to notify the police, and he does not have the permit for the gun (big shocker).

What's the deal with having to carry a weapon into the club anyways. Earlier this year two Marquette University girls were arrested for stabbing someone outside a club. I don't get it? What ever happened to the old fashioned way of getting back at someone by slowly seeking revenge on them buying destroying them piece by piece over the years?

Thanksgiving Lessons

Hope every one had a great Thanksgiving. I learned a great life lesson yesterday:
"No matter how fast you run and how hard you fight, yo always end up on someone's dinner table with a pound of stuffing up you a**. " Really makes you think.

Also, we were driving back home from up north last night. Driving through the town of Sheboygen, we drove right past their Best Buy. There were probably 20 people camping outside Best Buy there in tents and sleeping bags (some had neither). WTF? It's 7:00 PM, and it doesn't open until 5 am? I know they are having some sales tomorrow, but seriously. Is it really that important to get Season 6 of Friends for $12.99? Anything short of giving a free flat-screen plasma HD TV to the first 50 customers, there is no way I would wait outside in the winter in Wisconsin for some crappy sales. Get a job people and actually earn money.

Random Rantings

So I had today off, and it has been awhile since I have experience the world on a random weekday:

• A bunch of us who work together went out last night for a few drinks, and man can you really see the other side of some coworkers after a few drinks. Why in the world would you decide to get shitty drunk in front of people you work with everyday? It's okay to control yourself in public with coworkers and then go home and polish off that bottle of Jameson alone in your basement, like some of us do. Also, why would you want to do karaoke in front of these same people, and find it weird that some people refuse to karaoke.
  
• Once your body is used to get up early on a Wednesday, there is no way to sleep late, even when you have nothing to do that.
• This morning I watched Tropic Thunder, hilarious movie. After watching that movie, this clip, and listening to this audio clip (some jag-off asking him bizarre and offensive questions at a press conference), I would have to say Robert Downey Jr. is the coolest guy in Hollywood.

• I was out and about running some errands, so I decided to stop at Taco Bell for lunch. These 2 chick in front of me ordered a bunch of stuff with extra meat, extra sour cream, and what not, and they both drank water. Their total was $22.50. At Taco BEll. How? My total was $4.74, and I was stuffed when I was done.
• I went on the freeway at 1:15, and there was already rush hour traffic then. Does anyone ever work a full day anymore?
• I stopped off at Barnes and Noble to see if about getting a book, since I now know how to read. There was a huge sign when you walked in saying "December 6th, 25% off sale on everything." It was some promotion to thank their customers and what not. So I turned around and figured I would come back next Saturday.
  
• Taking a nap at 3:30 is awesome.
• It's going to be a long winter now that It's Alway's Sunny In Philedelphia's season is over.
  

You call this a team?

So, since there was no Packer game today, I was flipping between the Bears-Rams game and Jets-Titans. Obviously the Jets-Titans is going to be more interesting, but I have too much of my fantasy team (and season) relying on the Jets-Titans game. (I am not doing well in that game. Dear Tennessee, run the ball.) I was on the Rams-BEars game right when it was going into halftime. The Rams are down 24-3 and the Rams fans begin to boo at halftime. What? What did you think was going to happen? Your Rams are horrible. If not for the Lions, you would have the worst team in football. It got me to thinking, what would actually make you want to go to a St. Louis Rams' football game?
I know St. Louis is the most dangerous city in America, but there has to be something better to do. I lived down there for 5 years, and I can rattle off hundreds of things I would rather do than go to a Rams game. (Two of which are give myself a root canal and volunteer to clean the top of the arch.)


PS: Why did we trade Favre again? Man, he is looking good today against the stellar defense of Tennessee.

PPS: Jay Glazer is officially dead to me. I have Ward (RB from Giants) and COllins (QB from Tennessee) on my fantasy team. I couldn''t decide who to start. ESPN.com said that Jacobs would probably not start, and Ward would start. So I decided to start Ward. Then on FOX Jay Glazer said Jacobs would start, and in fact felt healthier than he had in weeks. So I sit Ward and start Collins. Then at half time, there is a breaking story that Jacobs won't start, in fact he won't play. Ward will start and get 90% of the snaps. What? How does Jacobs go from being healthier than he has in weeks, to no playing. At this point I am pretty sure Jay Glazer is just making this s**t up.

Quick Rant

I just stopped at my local watering hole for a bite to eat and a few (3) beers. These two "guys" next to me were having a 15 minute conversation about seat warmers in their cars. They were talking about how long they take to get warm, and how hot they can get, and how they can't live without them in winter. Seriously? Are your lives that boring and pathetic that you have to sit around and discuss this? My advice, kill yourselves, you are sad.

That is all, I told you it would be quick. (That's what she said.)

Sex, Drugs, Rock 'n Roll, and Advertising

Recently NPR came out with this report linking teenagers who watch certain TV shows and being more likely to have sex and become pregnant. "experts" have been lining tv show content to behaviors in people for years. I don't think a certain show links to teenage pregnancy. Three of the shows on the list; That 70s Show, Sex and the City, and Friends, do not feature direct teenage sex and except two characters on Friends, none of the shows feature pregnancy. Of the three, only really That 70s Show have I ever watched. It is about teenagers in the 70s doing drugs and annoying their parents, nothing else.

Then I saw this commercial:


Now I could see how this commercial could increase teenage pregnancy. Every guy that watches that wants to be that guy, and every girl wants to be that girl. Look how cool they are, and they are lying and then telling the truth, how hipster of them. Also, this is not the only new Levi's commercial that hints at teenage or unmarried sex. Others here,and here

Watch the roads people

So I was driving home today and I drove past 7 accidents, 7! Keep in mind it was barely snowing, I would not even call it flurries. But since it was the first time this year we had any snow, people panicked. I even witnessed a lady break at a stop sign, lose control, or go up on the curb nearly hitting the stop sign.

People, drive a little slower, stop talking on the phone, and just get home and lock your doors. It's only snow. If this is any sign of things to come, it will probably be an even more frustrating winter than last year. Oh joy! Mother Nature, you are already on notice!

Sports Time

This weekend I got to go the Bucks game (not my choice) and the Packers game (my choice). Here are my rants.

• The Bucks game was suppossed to start at 7:30 and at 7:30 the crowd started cheering and hollering, but I saw nothing happening on the court. Oh, wait the NBA is still dead to me.
• The Bradley Center is the edgrimley of NBA stadiums, an absolute dump. The season is a week and a half old, it was a Saturday night, the Bucks were playing the defending champion Boston Celtics, and yet they place was about 3/4 full. I bet the team is in Las Vegas or Seattle in 6 years.
• I got the tickets through work for free, and they were usually $37, and were in the 9 row of section 419, seen here. My god is the NBA expensive. They were not good seats, yet more expensive than a baseball game. I would hate to have a family and try to take them to a game, I am glad my ex-wife does that kind of stuff.
• PArking in downtown Milwaukee, 3 blocks away was $20. I guess all those years going to Miller Park you get spoiled.
• At the parking complex I used instead of having someone at the gate take your money when you go in or come out (which would make more sense), here is their operation. When I parked they had a lady at the entrance press the button and give me the ticket and wait for the gate to open. She then told me to take the ticket to entrance C and pay for parking and get a new ticket that said I paid. I went there and there were two machines in which you put you original ticket and the money and you get a new ticket. In here they had two employees supervising while everyone pushed buttons, not rocket science. After the game they had employees at each exit taking your paid ticket and pressing a button so the gate opened up. What? Wouldn't it just be easier to have someone at the entrance or exit collecting money?
• Today at Lambeau Field was a much different expereince. Lambeau Field is the Clint Eastwood of professional fotball stadiums, old but still cool and better than most.
• There is nothing like going to a Packer game, even if I had to get up at 5:30 and hit the road by six, and stand around outside from 9 am until 4 Pm. Great time.
• It was absolutely freezing outside. I was wearing 3 socks, long underwear, pants, a shirt, a sweater, a sweatshirt, a winterjacket, gloves, a hat, and a hood. The coldest part on my body was my feet, with my face a close second.
• Bears fans talk a lot of s**t until they are down 10-3 and quickly down by 21 points.
• We tailgated for a bit, which is bad-a** in freezing cold. This group next to us were tailgating our of a old ambulance, no joke. They had the inside gutted with benches, hand warmers, and then took out 2 larger grilles and grilled up some steaks; before and after the game.
• We parked a half block away at a K*Mart, and it was only $20, which I think is pretty good for an NFL game. K*Mart block off the whole lot for tailgaters, and they probably making a killing on it, despite not having any real customers.
• We must have been asked by 15 different people for money for various reasons; veterans of foreign wars, boy scouts, different churches, help fight aids, The United Way. After a while I just ran out of singles.
  
• For the first game this year, the Packers looked good on all sides of the ball. Their pass defense still looks good, their rush defense looked good for a change, their passing game is steady, and for a change their rushing offense looked good. At only 5-5 I still am not sold on them winning their division (they still have New Orleans, Carolina, Bears, and Jacksonville), it's jsut too little too late.
• Once I dethaw, I may have more rants
  

Wednesday Rants

I had a normal day at work but encountered a few things that got my blood flowing in the 3 hours since.

• I drove home on the freeway in Rush Hour (which I usually don't) and a guy in the next lane was texting while driving in traffice. Also, I let in 6 different cars into my lane because they were in the wrong lane, and not one raised their hand to thank me.
  
• I went out to eat dinner with my parents, just because, and was easy dropping on an interesting converstation between two women at the next table. First they talked for 15 minutes about how they had driven past each other in their gated community culdesac in surban America, and they thought it was hilarious. They must lively increadibly boring lives as soccer moms if they conversation lasted 15 minutes. Then one of them made this comment when talking about finding a job, "I want to find something where I can volunteer, but get paid for it." What? Someone needs a dictionary.
• In case you thought people couldn't get any stupidie, I read a number of articles( 1, 2, 3, 4 5) tonight about a new theoru called the "Huxtable Effect." Basically it says that without the Cosby show people would not have voted for Obama. The Cosby show showed white America that a black family is not a scary thought, they are just like "us." I've watched The Simpsons for years, that doesn't mean I would vote for a 300 pound idiot with yellow skin and 4 fingers.
• Here's an example of what America's youth is pawning off as work nowadays in school.
  

What gas crisis?

I went to get gas today, and it was $2.17 a gallon. That is the lowest that it has been in years. It's so cheap that I lined by trunk with garbage bags and filled it with gas. Now I am taking the gas from my trunk into my bath tub by using a an empty milk carton. As soon as I am done I am going to bathe in the gasoline. I love freedom!

Football Rants

After watching football today, a few observations:

• The Packers are better than their record, or at least they should be. Their defense is good, real good, except against the run. They can't tackle to save their mother's life. Their secondary is possible the best in the league, and they can go 6-7 players deep out there. You can blame today's loss on one person, Mike McCarthey (excluding my wife). He made some horrible calls at the end of the half and at the end of the game. It is never a good idea to "settle" for a field goal on the road when it will still be a 50 yard field goal. At the end of the game they should have been trying to score a TD instead of running out the clock. Horrible play calling throughout. Jennings and Driver only had 8 total catches. They are your 2 best players on offense and should be having a total of 15-20 catches a game, especially a close game. Should have won.
• If Packers lose next week (which they will) their season is officially over.
• The Rams and Lions are two of the worst teams I have seen in years. The Rams gave up 47 points, 40 in the first half, unbelievable. The Lions got killed by the Jags, and are 0-9. They just went out and got Culpepper to improve their offense, and what do they do with him this week, they throw the ball only 10 times, 10 times. That makes no sense. In a game that they were losing the whole game for, why would you only pass it 10 times? Especially when your best offensive player is a WR.
• After the game when the analysts were talking the TV told me that the Raiders are highly likely to sign Michael Vick this off-season, once he is out of the clink. That would just be a match made in heaven I think. The Raiders are were careers go to die (Sapp, Moss, Walker, etc).
  

Still Dead to Me.....

Mother Nature has been Dead to Me for about 10 months now. The many reasons why are here. Then today I come out of work at 4 PM and it is doing some kind of precipitation, not quite snow, not quite rain. I didn't know what it was. I do know that it sucked. Just 2 days ago it was 75 degrees and sunny, now today it was 34-40 degrees and totally cloudy. Now on Saturday the weather is forecasting to snow. I swear if we have a winter even half as bad as last year...........

Next Please,

So I am assuming everyone voted yesterday, otherwise you must hate freedom. I went to the polls at 6:30, hoping to get there early before they open vote right when they open and get to work. At 6:30 there was a line that would have probably been 1 1/2 hours to 2 hours long, so I said screw it. I got out of work as soon as I could and went right to the poll. This time there was literally 1 person there, and it was a more "prime time," it was 4:30. I think everyone rushed out and went right in the morning because they heard lines were going to be so long, and in fact they weren't. I received number 843 at 4:30, so I don't think they were that busy all day.

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Also, did anyone watch CNN last night during their election coverage and saw that hologram shit they were using? Holy crap? I think technology is going to outpace us here any day. They were having an interactive conversation with someone who was half-way across the country but they looked like they were in the studio. I wonder when this will be available for civilian use. I could be at home, yet be at work. I could be in jail, yet be at my ex-wife's Thanksgiving dinner, the potential is unlimited.

One More Election Rant

A few last election rants before the real deal on Tuesday:

• Have you heard of The Bradley Effect. It is interesting, yet sad that it would occur based on race in this day and age.
• I you missed this interview on the Daily Show with Bill Kristol (not Billy Crystal). It was great because there were two highly intelligent people discussing real topics, hilarious because Kristol still thinks McCain will win, and it was hilarious because Jon Stewart basically says Kristol is an idiot for still supporting McCain, yet Stewart and McCain still get along and are genuine to each other. It shows two people can disagree yet still get along.

• I think this is still a cool commercial:

• Starbucks is giving away a free cup of coffee on Tuesday for anyone who is voting. It's cool because they are not picking a side, just saying, "hey, go vote you lazy a-hole." Yes, Starbucks are run by Hippies and represent everything that is wrong in this world.

On Friday I was in an elevator and these two chicks were in it. One asked the other, "hey did you vote yet?" The other one said "I'm not going to to vote." "Why" asked the other one. "I'm proving a point." Wait? What? What point are you trying to make exactly? There are only a few reasons you wouldn't vote, and making a point that no one will see is not one of them.

• You hate freedom
• You have a criminal record
• You are Canadian
• You hate America
• You are a terrorist
• You are under 18
  

Stupid video, but Jonah Hill is hilarious. "I have 19 kids, I never used abortion once." "Darfur...that sounds like a t-shirt company to me." "I never did shit on drugs except play Halo II."Oh yeah, and Natalie Portman is hot.
(Update) I guess they have another video now:

Random Rantings- Weekend Edition

I want out on a Friday, which I normally don't do, and today I can barely talk (these are unrelated) and here are my rantings:

• I was watching Sports Center this morning and half of the Top Ten plays were blacked out. Were there that few highlights yesterday, that they didn't have 10 great plays? Weird. (Update: it appears that the NBA season has started, and they probably had a few plays in the top ten.....whatever)
• I will say some people are quite creative with their Halloween costumes (and some are not). Last night I saw 5 people dressed and Pacman and 4 ghosts chasing them, quite good. Two dudes were dressed as Mario and Luigi, 2 dudes were dressed as Umpa-Lumpas from Willy Wonka, the band there were all dressed as famous musicians- Willy Nelson, Axl ROse, Buddy Holly, and Blues Brothers-. Then there were unoriginal costumes like the Joker (it's too obvious to dress like that, you should kill youself) and generic things like slutty nurse, slutty cop, slutty whatever.
• My new least favorite question people ask me is "What kind of music do you listen to? How do I answer that "A little bit of everything?" Or do I dumb it down for them so they know the bands I am mentioning like "Oh U2, Justin Timberlake, yadayadayada...." Or do I tell them a real answer like "Tv on the Radio, The Hold Steady, and Band of Horses." and then the idiot who asked me looks at me like I am crazy and I just made up all those bands. I went with the latter answer last night and both people did look at me like I just made up those names.
• Packers signed Aaron Rogers to a "Tony Rom0-like" contract. After 7 games, in which he won 4 games, and was hurt. Seems a bit premature. I don't want to hate on the guy but it is unprecident to see this happen, ever. I guarantee when this is all done in about 15 years it will come out that Ted Thompson is really Aaron Rogers' biological father, that is why he goes above and beyound for the QB.
• Next season's Brewers' season will be laid out in the next 30 days. If they don't get CC, they are done next year. If they sign him for the reported 4 year 100 million, they are done because they will have no money for Hardy, Hart, Gallardo, Parra or anyone else. They need to get him for about $18 mil a year for 3 years, that way it expires the year they need to resign Hart, Gallardom and Parra, then all you have to worry about the year before is Hardy.

That is all (for now) I am going to lie down again for a bit. Angry-dreaming, here I come.