Never-Ending Nightmare

SOmetimes the world creates a story so bizarre and f**ked up that you wonder if this is all a horrible dream and one day we will all wake up. Then we don't.

I am sure we have all heard the story about the Austrian man who had children with his daughter. Okay this is pretty f**ked-up and horrible. A 9 of 10 on the scale of "This world is f**ked-up Scale." What would push a grown man to have children (3) with his own daughter while still being married to his wife. WTF? My god, is there nothing that separates us from wild animals. I am not a zoologist but I do not know of any animals who have children with their own offspring.

Then live gives us another little gem. This man kept his daughter and then their children (half grandchildren, half children) all locked in the basement of the house. So he was on the first and second floor with his wife and children from his wife, and then he would go in the basement where his other full daughter was locked up with their new children. How did no one realize this was going on? How did this wife not know that their daughter had been locked up in the basement and there was a whole other family. I may not be the best judge of this seeing that I didn't realize that my first wife never loved me and was leaving in the middle of the night to go shack-up with her lover. At least this was not all occurring in our basement and with one of our children.

This is really a story that makes you absolutely and 100% disgusted at the human species. Shame on human race, shame on you Austrians. (Insert throw up sound)

Still Funny

I'm sitting here tonight trying to relax after another day and try to silence the voices in my head. I decided to give the old television a chance. On NBC they are playing the Best of Alec Baldwin on SNL. I have argued for years (even before his turn on 30 Rock) that Alec Baldwin was an under-appreciated comedian and may have been the best host of SNL ever over the course of his career. He never had the single best skit or the single best episode, but throughout all his times on SNL his stuff was hilarious. (Him and Sandler camping...Sweaty Balls...Bill Bradskey, classic).





Alec Baldwin is also hilarious off screen.


Hilarious!


Not sure what this is, but that costume he is wearing is hilarious!


The Departed is a great movie, but his banter with Marky-Mark is classic.

"Birds of Feather....

.......Flock Together"

Here is a quick blurb in today's paper about our fan-favorite NEd Yost and his best friend:

Designated hitter

Comedian Larry the Cable Guy, otherwise known as Dan Whitney, took part in pre-game batting practice with the Brewers. A friend of Yost's, Whitney dressed out in a sleeveless Brewers jersey with "Larry" on the back, with one leg of his pants down and the other hitched up.

After watching the left-hander take several swings in the cage, Yost announced, "He swings the bat better than any celebrity I've ever seen."

Whitney has lost some 50 pounds while participating in a well-chronicled diet plan, but Yost said, "I think you can still sneak a pitch under his belt."

Do we need any more evidence that Yost should be fired? He is best friends with a no-talent, idiotic, ass-clown. He is bringing this guy in to make a joke of batting practice. The way the Brewers are batting, they need to take batting practice very seriously. And why would Yost be best friends with someone from Chicago who is a huge Cubs Fan (see picture).
Even if Yost were the greatest manager in the game (hint, hint, he isn't) he should be fired on simple principle. Birds of feather, flock together.

Almost over.

With nothing really to do this morning I decided to turn on my television (always a mistake) and see what was on this lovely Sunday morning. With the Brewer's game not on yet, it was a struggle to find anything on. I noticed that the NBA Playoffs were on. Oh, it must almost be the Finals already. No, oh wait......it's still only the FIRST ROUND! WTF? The playoffs started 2 weeks ago, and its still the First Round. Do these guys only play once a week? Most of the series are 2-1, and they have to play the best of 7. It seems as if each round will take a month. The Finals will be played about 3 weeks before the new season starts in October. Thank god, I don't know what I would do without the NBA. Nothing like watching over-paid, cocky, man-giants do spin-moves in the air and hogging the ball and not playing defense.

Incentives?

I was getting ready for another day working for the man and decided to turn on the morning news to see what was happening in the world. I should have known that I would see something that would get my juices going so early. The local news featured this story about flowers and rainbows.

Just kidding, it is a story about the guy who owns the company who sold the guns used at Virginia Tech AND in Illinois recently, wants to pass a law allowing for concealed weapons on college campuses. The best line from the article is the school official who says "it was 'terribly offensive' that Thompson would set foot on campus." I mean what is this guy thinking? I sold guns to two people who collectively killed nearly 50 innocent people, I should advocate more people to have guns? How is this guy even in business, who is still buying guns from him? Future serial killers?


I didn't do very well in business classes, but doesn't this guy have an unethical incentive here? If students are allowed to have concealed weapons, more students would buy a gun, he would make more profit. Wow, what a novel idea.

This concelaed weapons on college campuses has many loyal followers, and even a website. CNN has even done a recent story on it. I once knew a couple of guys in college that had some very heated arguments. Once one of them threw a vodka bottle at the other, threw a chair at the other, threw a slice of pizza, and threw his glass bear glass off the balcony. I would hate to see what would have had if either of them had a concealed weapon.

Not Again....

I've been warning everyone for many years now that bears are starting to become organized are are entering our cities and will begin to attack soon. Now a bear that was recently an entertained and box office hit has turned on humans and has killed.

Don't let the door hit ya.....

Where the good lord split ya. The Brewers have made their first smart move in awhile (outside of not resigning Jenkins). They traded away Gross.

What is Yost going to do without his boyfriend to go home to night after night after making stupid decisions during the game. I figured the two were going out, there would be no other explanation how he has had a roster spot for 3 years and continually starts before Hart and Kapler and stays in the game after Braun is taken out.

They could have gotten a bologna sandwich at this point for all I cared. Gross was useless. I really feared that the odd man out in all this was going to be Gwynn. Gwynn has done everything that the franchise has asked of him and more and I think he is the long term solution at center field. I still believe that Cameron is also useless. They need to find a package deal and get rid of Cameron, Turnblow and/or Gagne; then they may be onto something, and actually have $20 million to spend on players with talent.

ENOUGH!!!

Eric Gagne has no right at all to be closing games in a major league uniform. He now has as many blown saves as he does saves. Someone forgot to teach him that ABC means ALways Be Closing.

I once had a roommate in college who gave the concept of closing the deal a bad name. He would go out get a girl drunk, slip in a few roofies, and still not get the girl back home. But, he looks like the greatest closer of all time compared to Gagne. Anyone who thinks steroids didn't make any of these players any better just needs to look at how poorly all these juicers on the Mitchell Report are doing this year.

Can't wait for the other juicer, Mike Cameron, to come back. I;m guessing he will bat .200 with 1 homerun and 13 RBI this year.

Where good television is.....

I have ranted many a time about the terrible television programming out there nowadays and all the idiots who sit mindlessly in front of the TV watching. Shows like American Idol rake in 26+million viewers while quality and educational programming goes unwatched. One such program was on PBS tonight. They have a show entitled American Experience in which they focus on Americans living in America's history and their effect on today and how we view these individuals years later. Tonight it focused on Roberto Clemente and focused on while he was alive he was just an athlete but after his death he stood for so much more. Since it is PBS and they are non-profit, you can watch the whole show here and get further information about the great man.

It's sad that no athlete we have nowadays will ever approach the world-wide humanitarian impact of Roberto Clemente. He played baseball because he was good at it and his ability there helped him open doors in which he could help other through. Nowadays every sport gives away some award to an athlete who is the best role model, unfortunately this award usually goes to the athlete who gets arrested the least and has the fewest illegitimate children, not someone who actually does something to actually make the world and history notice.

Yosted

We went through another weekend of Brewer's baseball and Ned Yost tried his best to get the Brewer's "Yosted" again. Once he was successful with his attempts.

On Saturday Yost took Suppan out of the game in the 7th even though he had given up only 1 run and like 3-4 hits and his pitch count was under 90. The next batter hit a 2 run home run to tie the game. He then took Ryan Braun out in a tie game yet left Gross in the game. Why do all this to put Braun in the outfield if Yost is going to do the same thing as last year and take him out of the game for "defensive" purposes. Also, why is Gross even starting over the hot-hitting Kapler? Luckily the Brewers pulled through and still won the game in the 10th despite Yost.

Sunday however we were not so lucky. We luckily got the lead in the 10th inning and for some reason Yost decided to put Gagne in. This was the 4th game in a row that Gagne had pitched. Closers are not suppossed to pitch 4 days in a row. If I had my way no one would ever work 4 days in a row, regardless of the job. Not suprising, 5 pitches later the game was tied. Why didn't Yost put Torres or Riske in? They both were just sitting there waiting for some action. Instead Yost went witht the over-worked and over-rated, non-juiced Gagne.

FIRE HIM!

S.O.S. another P.O.S.

Help there's another Piece of S**t movie coming out. There has not been a decent movie come out in the theaters since the first week or two of January. And now we have this gem:



At least it's not featuring Larry the Cable Guy. But come on, this movie sucked the first time, when it was called "My Best Friend's Wedding." Why would anyone see this 10 years later? Oh my god, my best friend is a chick and I think I am in love with her, too bad she only looks at me as a "friend," and probably thinks I am gay. Can a dude even be a Maid of Honor? Would anyone dude want to be? I think you would have to put your testicles in a jar on your dresser. It's also official that Patrick Dempsey has no dignity and may not even be a man. He is the "star" of Grey's Anatomy, Sweet Home Alabama, Enchanted, and now has "starred" in this P.O.S.

Gas 360!

Gas prices have finally come full circle. (Get it? Prices are $3.60 and a circle is 360 degrees.) Really? Gas is that expensive nowadays? These gas companies are making money hand over fist and are not in danger of missing any meals. I think this guy put it best:




Why are prices this high? I don't think the supply or demand of gas has changed that drastically in the last month or two, when prices were only $3.00. I know we are fighting a war, but come on people. I am not going to fall in line with all those hippies out there and start walking or taking bus, but gas prices really are getting ridiculous. I might do what they do in Grand Theft Auto and just start car-jacking people and taking their cars, driving until it is out of gas, and then ditch it for a new car with gas in it.

Vote or Die!

I've always been a fan of voting, it is one of the many reasons you have to love America and Freedom. So whatever you do, just go out and vote. It doesn't matter who you vote for as long as you vote, otherwise you can't complain at all after the fact. This video does a good job of summing up the problem facing voters this year.

Money Well Spent??

Baseball season is now 2 weeks old so I figured I would leave my first of probably many rants on the Milwaukee BRewers.

So far they have looked good enough and Yost really hasn't been able to 'Yost' the team yet. One thing that is getting me worried is the lack of any kind of production from Fielder. He has really done nothing yet this year. That aside, I still think the team needs to resign their cornerstone players this year. In order they would be Braun, Fielder, Hart, Sheets, Weeks, Villeneuva, Gallardo, and then the role players.

Looking at the actual team salaries they do have money that they could have spent on these players coming into this season, but should have next year for sure. By my calculations they should have over32 million. (That is just the salaries of Sheets, Gagne, Cameron, and Kendall), and if they could somehow move the salaries of Capuano and Bush and Turnblow, that would be another $10 million. They could resign all those players listed for $42 million. Plus Torres, Moto, and Riske make $10 milliona combined, and I do not know the status of their contracts.

As much credit I give the organization for actually spend money for the first time in 25 years, they may have spent their money worse than any other organization in the league.

• Why do we need Cameron when Kapler is hitting the way he is now. He is actually feared out there.
• With already 2 blown saves in 5 tries and an ERA over 7 Gagne is already a bust. Turnblow is a total bust and is useless.
• Counsell gets one at bat a week and usually strikes out and hits into a double play, so why did we resgin him?
• Bush just sucks and Capuano may never pitch again.
• Riske and Torres are doing alright but Moto has gotten lit up in two games straight.

My one wish this year besides making the playoffs for the first time in 25 years is that the upper-heads with the Brewers stop spending money on these "gritty vets" and role players and spend it on the cornerstone of the organization.

I'm Rich Bi**h

I've always said that was I am a multi-millionaire a hundred times over I am going to turn all my money into coins, put it in a silo, and swim in it like Scrooge McDuck.

Now however after watching a news piece about what rich-ivy league-yuppy-East Coast- right wing- goons do with their money I may have changed my mind.
Video here.

Article here.

Now I love freedom and I am not one of those blame America first people however.....You wonder why everyone else in the world hates Americans. Maybe because we have large cults of people with nothing better to do than spend millions on a license plate with a number on it. There are millions of people starving to death all over the world, and in this great country, but at least you have a #9 on you license plate. I hope you sleep well at night.

New Products

There has been a lot of talk in the blog-o-sphere about my many loyal readers get more involved in this fight against anger. Now you all have a chance. We here at anger-ranting have created a t-shirt for all you loyal readers to wear and sport around town. Now everyone will know that it is okay to be angry. Everyone deserves a chance to come in and rant with other angry individuals.


We are also working on a second prototype shirt, will be available soon.

Its Raining Men, I mean Mudd

Mother Nature is doing some odd things lately. Yesterday I think it rained mud for a while during the day. On Thursday night it downpoured all night and when I got inot my car Friday morning it was clean from the rain. I drove to work, yada, yada,yada. When I left work at 4PM my car was covered in what looked like muddy rain drops. Similar to this picture.
Muddy Rain Drops would make for a great name for an emo band, but when falling from the sky its not as cool. I'm not even too sure how the science behind this would work.

I'm Blind!

I'm not a meteorologist, I'm barely litterate, but apparently when it downpurs for 24 hours and the next day is a lot warmer, crazy amounts of fog form. Driving to work today I experienced probably the thickest fog I have ever experienced in my life. You could barely see 3-4 car lengths in front of you. Driving in fog is no big deal, the roads are still fine, you just have to pay a little more attention to the road. All that meant to me is that I couldn't send my usual 6 text messages to my ex-wife while driving to work. What got me angry however was that I saw about 10 cars driving without their lights on. Thats just stupid, no one can see you, you a**-hole. If you want to kill yourself do it the privacy of your own home, or on the front lawn of your ex-lover, not on public roads.

Summer Plans.....

One of the many reasons I have chose my profession is that I get summers off (ha!ha!) Obviously that makes for great opportunities to go to baseball games but now I have a new reason to have this summer off.

Things to note:

• Did you see that picture on that article? They all look like douche-bags, but Mark Wahlberg's brother (in the middle) looks like a complete a**-hole, douche-bag-tool.
  
• The money quote is from baby Wahlberg as well, he says that they aren't going to play the old material. Don't be one of those bands that only plays the new stuff, even though people are only there to hear the new stuff. Lame.
• I once had a roomate in college who went to see them in concert during grade school. Tool.
• These bastards must really be broke and attention-starved. Why not join one of those many celebrity shows. 'Dancing with the Stars' or 'Who wants to kill themselves?'
  

Are you kidding me? New Kids on the Block are reuniting? Who do you think that they think are going to care? Even young kids nowadays don't listen to 'Boy Band' music. Kids listen to those terrible one hit wonder manufactured crappy rap artists (Akon) or those one hit wonder watered-down suburban punk (Good Charlotte, and many, many others). This is sad.

Pretentious Much?

Last night I went out to a not so neighborhood bar (an Irish bar that really isn't an Irish bar). It's not a place I would regularly go to, but I was meeting up with a couple of former co-workers to discuss "things." I only lasted about 45 minutes there because of two large factors:

• The band that was playing was a U2 cover band. You would think if you were a musician, this would be the lowest way of making a living for yourself that there would be out there. You may as well kill yourself. Not only as a musician are you not playing your own music, you are cover one of the most pretentious full of themselves bands out there, who's music really isn't that great to begin with, but is even worse because everyone thinks they are the second coming of Christ. Also, the band leader wears sunglasses indoors and goes by only one name. The lead singer of this cover band put in way too much effort to try to look exactly like Bono too. The saddest thing was that people there were really getting into it and enjoying the music.
• 

• Secondly, athough it was 10:30 and it was in a loud bar someone genius and future Darwin Award winner thought it would be a great idea to bring their baby into the bar. The baby looked like she was probably about 3 months old. Yes, I know the baby was only there for about 5 minutes and you just wanted to show her off to your other white-trash coworkers and the company annual cluster-f**k, but come on. GET A BABY SITTER!

Emotional Rollercoaster

Today I had an emotional roller coaster as a sports fan, and blamed it all on my wife of course. First there was a report that Favre was considering coming back and play f0r another team if the Packers would trade him. So I immediately went home and blamed my wife for this in my usual way, because it was her vault after all. Then came out another report that these initial reports were false and in fact Favre was definitely not coming back. After hearing this, it re-awoke my initial anger of Favre retiring and I had to once again take it out on my wife, since it was her fault that he retired in the first place.

Athlete Personal Lives

I was sitting at work today and like usual reading all the articles I could find on my favorite baseball player (and possibly my father) Jose Canseco. I ran across this one that is hilarous. First Canseco accuses A-Rod of using Steroids, and now for cheating with his wife. What does Canseco have against A-Rod anyways. At this point Canseco is a walking joke. He has "written" two books on people he thinks has used steroids, has been on many celebrity reality shows, and once had a ball bounce of his head and turn into a homerun.

Also of note is Matt Leinhart's busy weekend. What;s wrong with a 26 year-old professional athlete hanging out with 20 year-olds and doing beer bongs? If I never did that I would never get a date.